


Ramenzo be gay and do crime while lookin fine

by nolongervoid



Series: Holy ramenzo [1]
Category: BoBoiBoy (Cartoon)
Genre: A lot of murder, BLESS RAMENZO AY, Crossdressing, For a mission, M/M, all hail ramenzo, also theres murder, dont worry though its not very important, its a disguise, kaizo and ramen are partners in crime goals, my muse would come back, oh wow i can still write, this is for you mama dude, this is just a whole ton of self-indulgent floof, whodathunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-21
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:34:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22350403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nolongervoid/pseuds/nolongervoid
Summary: The alternative title was a keysmash soThats basically the fic. Yall dont need a summary
Relationships: Kapten Kaizo | Captain Kaizo/Manramen, Ramenzo
Series: Holy ramenzo [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1610809
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	Ramenzo be gay and do crime while lookin fine

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Dudestopno](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dudestopno/gifts).



> So it turns out i can still write sometimes

The satin is foreign against his skin.

Kaizo stares into the mirror, barely recognizing himself. Well, to be fair, that's kind of the point. The mission is simple- infiltrate, eliminate, escape. It should only take a few hours, so he should be out of this dress sooner than later. Still, he's pretty sure he'd rather keep his legs covered- with something heavy and bulletproof. Because the only material he can get away with over his skin in this disguise is lace.

Kaizo wouldn't be caught dead in lace.

"I didn't know you'd make a dress look so good."

He hears the smirk before he sees it, and, sure enough, Ramen steps forward to join his reflection in the glass. Kaizo casually looks away, but not before passing a glance over his partner's form.

Ramen doesn't look half-bad himself. Rather he cleans up quite nicely. But Kaizo isn't about to tell him that.

Instead, to avoid coming across as an arrogant and ill-mannered imbecile, which he most certainly is not, he clears his throat and mutters, 

"You look okay."

Ramen raises an eyebrow and Kaizo hastily finishes, "... _er_ than usual."

"I'll take that," the blond shrugs, giving his tie one final adjustment before he's off.

Kaizo releases a breath. It's only a few hours, but when his partner for the mission looks _that_ good, he has no idea how he's going to survive.

-

Their target is a speakeasy- well established among the galactic underground and infamous for shady deals. Everyone from the bartenders to the entertainers is a prominent face on the TAPOPS Most Wanted list. This mission isn't one for amateurs. They've only got one shot at this- no second chances if they screw it up.

Reading through the mission details, they've got this in the bag. Ramen tells him too.

"You and I- we make a pretty great team," Ramen mentions in an off-hand voice, watching the spaceship dashboard. Even though the ship is on autopilot, they're still on the lookout for the perfect point to cloak- not too close to risk being detected, nor too far to risk being exposed in the passage from the ship to the establishment.

Kaizo doesn't look up from the holographic file, so Ramen goes on.

"All those days training together came up to this, huh?"

Kaizo scowls very slightly. He does not like to think about their training days. Those days bring back memories of...other things. Memories he would rather keep locked in a box in a dusty room at the back of his head that he pretends doesn't exist.

"Remind me when your father plans to send in reinforcements," Kaizo changes the topic. "They're not listed in here anywhere."

Ramen laughs lightly. "That's because there are no reinforcements."

Kaizo pauses at that. Maskmana must have a lot of trust in them not to be sending reinforcements. Their target consists of a party of at least fifteen, if not twenty, well-armed and trained individuals. Ramen and him are just two people…

He thinks back to the battle against the space pirates. Maskmana didn't hesitate to send _him_ reinforcements despite Kaizo not needing the help. So trust in Ramen, more like.

"We're a great team," Ramen repeats. "We'll be in and out and they won't know what hit 'em."

He's right, of course. It's just been a while since they were on a mission together, is all.

-

Half an hour into their infiltration, Kaizo is sitting on a barstool, careful to keep his posture subtle and feminine. To his right is Ramen, to his left is a man who is drinking himself tipsier by the minute. Ramen glances at his watch. The man laughs a little. Kaizo wishes he weren't here.

"Keep an eye out for the ones who aren't getting any drinks. They're probably here for sketchy deals."

As if Kaizo didn't already know that. At the same time, half the people here are drunk or drinking, so it's probably easier to-

"The ones drinking finer wine are also trying to blend in without getting drunk," Ramen whispers.

Kaizo never did learn the difference between champagne and vodka. He waits a moment for Ramen to lean back and sit straight on his own stool but he doesn't. Kaizo stiffens slightly, wondering what Ramen is looking at. He can't see his eyes but he can more or less sense that he isn't look at _him_. Kaizo glances out of the corner of his own eye as Ramen takes a lock of his hair between his fingers and traces it gently. Kaizo is about to ask him what he's doing even though he can hardly think with Ramen breathing so close against his face, when-

"Aren't you a pretty one…"

Kaizo all but whips around as something foreign makes contact with his exposed back. _This freaking dress, Maskmana I am going to freaking-_

He pulls away from the stranger's hand and turns to face him, Ramen's hand now cupping his jaw as they both watch the drunkard. Kaizo can't talk to risk giving himself away, so instead he clears his throat quietly and glares. Ramen turns his face towards himself and Kaizo briefly forgets how to breathe as the other leans in closer than before.

" _Darling_ ," he purrs, and Kaizo can't help but shiver, "won't you give me this dance?"

That's the code word, but, sure enough, the musicians end their last song and change to something a bit louder, more lively. Kaizo flashes a small smirk at the man who tried to hit on him as Ramen takes his hand and leads him to the dance floor.

They start off slow, just easing into the beat, and more couples take to the floor. Perfect- everything is going exactly as planned. They've practiced ballroom dancing before, way back when Maskmana insisted they expand their skill set to be well-rounded TAPOPS members. Kaizo always hated being the follower, but he has to admit Ramen was always better at leading anyway. So he goes along with it, the movements practically muscle memory, though something feels...different, this time. Maybe it's the atmosphere, the live musicians in place of dusty records, the low-hanging chandeliers and shiny carved wood, the air tinged with cigar smoke and alcohol. Definitely not his fine partner in that swanky suit that does far too many favors to his already attractive figure. Kaizo's mind goes foggy and his body all but melts into Ramen's will.

The music swells and they switch partners. They try to stay close anyway, Ramen's suit jacket brushing gently against his bare back. Kaizo forces a tight grin at the man now guiding him, scanning him up and down instinctively. His toupee is precisely fixed in place- it barely looks fake, but Kaizo has enough experience with Koko Ci's costumes wardrobe to recognize a wig when he sees one. His spectacles shine in the light at certain angles, casting a glare over his eyes that doesn't let Kaizo see them. They make a half-turn, and the lenses flash once. Kaizo nearly trips over his four-inch heels.

The man casts him a curious glance, pressing his lips together as Ramen stiffens behind them, taking the subtle cue. It's showtime.

Just in time, the music signals another partner switch, and Kaizo finds himself thrown back into Ramen's arms. He barely has time to process the sudden shift before Ramen is lifting him up, bringing him back down to his feet, spinning him round and sending the skirt of his dress swishing about his legs.

"All of them," Ramen mouths in confirmation, and Kaizo barely nods in acknowledgement before swooping a leg back and tripping the couple behind them.

They let out a yelp of surprise as they fall, failing to regain their balance, and sending another duo off their feet. Kaizo and Ramen spring apart and the blond flashes a cheeky grin at the audience now staring at them in shock and surprise. Kaizo looks down to see someone grabbing at his foot, then lifts his heel to bring it down on their hand, crushing it with a satisfying crunch. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees five different people reach for arms.

Very well. They came prepared for a gunfight, after all.

Kaizo snatches a dagger from the sheath hidden at his side under the dress, aims for the closest gunman, and throws. It collides with the side of his face and leaves a long scar before lodging itself in his skull. He snatches up a handful of cutlery from the table next to him and yeets those too, glancing away as they make contact with eyes, faces, and throats.

Ramen lifts him up and runs his fingers over his leg, fingers wrapping around the gun strapped to Kaizo's thigh and pulling it out as the latter shivers at the sensation. He aims and fires, turning 180° as he shoots down everyone in point-blank range.

Kaizo activates his mask, currently concealed in the form of a bedazzled headband in his hair. He whips the handle out from its holder at his hip just as the blade extends- pure, vibrating energy.

The few survivors' eyes widen.

"It's them- they're agents from TAPOPS!" one of them call out, as if it wasn't already obvious to everyone in the room, or too late.

Kaizo leaps forward and slashes as Ramen kneels down behind him to pick up a gun that belonged to one of the fallen. He tests it once before deciding he prefers his own, and instead uses the bullets to reload. Kaizo slices the lounge patrons in half, leaving a smoking line along the wall behind them, before stepping back to face Ramen who's shot down the bar and tosses him another ownerless gun.

They walk a circle, facing each other but watching their guns over one another's shoulder. They shoot three times in sync, then Ramen sweeps his free hand under Kaizo's arm to rest against his shoulder blade, and Kaizo puts his own left hand next to Ramen's neck. The blond responds by leaning in for the final musical swell provided by the last people left standing in the speakeasy, and Kaizo retracts his helmet. For mere entertainers, the musicians are remarkably unfazed after witnessing mass murder. The sounds mellow down to a few last dramatic notes, and Kaizo finds himself almost magnetically drawing closer and closer to Ramen, and vice versa, and his eyes close of their own accord as the piece ends and Ramen's lips are on his.

Kaizo forgets how to think and also how to breathe. He loses track of time and when Ramen pulls away it's like they've been kissing forever and yet not at all at the same time. They stare at each other for several moments, just catching their breath and remembering how to function. 

"And that's what you get for touching _my_ bunny," Ramen breaks the silence to announce to the man who probably can't even hear him.

Kaizo is very aware that his cheeks are burning and is tempted to look away; he can feel Ramen's gaze fixated on him even though he can't see his eyes. After a while, Kaizo summons his courage and clears his throat,

"I-is that all?"

"Infiltrate, eliminate, escape," Ramen repeats, lifting his head slightly. Kaizo licks his lips, realizing what Ramen was probably looking at so intently, and suddenly self-conscious.

"All we have to do now is get out, then," Kaizo says dumbly, as if that weren't already the most obvious thing to do.

Ramen nods, stepping back but offering a hand. "Need help getting to the spaceship?"

Kaizo rolls his eyes and kicks off his heels. "I wasn't planning on wearing these any longer than absolutely necessary, anyway."

Ramen doesn't question him walking back to the spaceship barefoot, which Kaizo is thankful for even though the way back is far from smooth and he'll have blisters on his soles for a week after this. He misses his cushioned combat boots. Ramen walks easily ahead of him and is already waiting at the door of the spaceship by the time Kaizo catches up.

"I'll key in the coordinates while you go change. Something tells me you want to be out of that sooner than later," Ramen says, not quite laughing but not serious either.

Kaizo looks deliberately away so Ramen can't see him blushing and biting his lip at the alternate implications of the comment, and hurries off to his own quarters to get changed.

-

Half an hour and two snack bags of carrot sticks later, Kaizo has completely shaken off the discomfort of the mission outfit and role, and finally steps out of the rest chamber to see what Ramen is up to. He stops in his tracks when he notices Ramen, unlike himself, has not changed out of his disguise. Worse, still, his clothes and hair are very slightly disheveled from the mission, and it only makes him more - Kaizo hates to think it - stupidly irresistibly attractive.

Ramen turns from the control panel. "Ay, you're back," he waves.

Kaizo, for the _n_ th time, represses a shudder at his language. Ramen is the only senior TAPOPS member who says "ay" and also gets away with it. It's silly and yet endearing all the same.

He ignores him and stands staring outside the window. "Did we get out without being detected?"

"This ship is the latest technology- it can stay cloaked the whole time until I activate the warp drive," Ramen says. "So yeah, all in all, pretty gucci."

Kaizo gapes. The only time he's ever heard the word "gucci" before and in that context was from Fang's friend- the obnoxious one who only cared about food. Even his powers were food-related. Kaizo was partial enough to carrots to hold his tongue and refrain from passing judgement, but it was still over-the-top.

Speaking of food, he would probably kill for some carrot noodles right now. Ramen made really really good carrot noodle-

The snap of the lights shutting off breaks Kaizo out of his thoughts. He turns around, about to ask if the power had somehow short-circuited in this "latest technology" ship, only to see Ramen standing right behind him and gently taking his hand into his own. Kaizo swallows nervously as Ramen lifts his hand onto his own shoulder, then brings his own hand to rest lightly on Kaizo's back. There's the soft whir of a record player spinning before his ears are filled with slow music playing in spaceship surround sound.

Ramen doesn't ask him if he can have this dance- Ramen doesn't ask him anything at all, and Kaizo speaks just as much. They're just taking slow steps to the beat, the music the only thing penetrating the silence. The only light is from the stars outside, twinkling through the window, just barely illuminating their outlines. 

Another step and Kaizo involuntarily leans closer, barely an inch between their chests. He weakly attempts to tilt his head back but Ramen sweeps him forward again with the music and his head is leaning forward again. Ramen's shoulder is right there and it looks so comfortable, so inviting, Kaizo just wants to rest his head there for a little while…

He shakes his head to jerk out of the thoughts. Sure Ramen kissed him in the bar, called him his bunny, told him he looked good-

Well, shit.

Kaizo's mouth drops slightly open in surprise and realization, before snapping it shut and bringing himself back into the moment. If Ramen really does like him like that, and Kaizo likes him too… They barely get any downtime at HQ and even when they do, the very concept of privacy is virtually nonexistent with Fang and his friends walking around all over the station. This may as well be his only chance.

Even in the fading light Kaizo can see the corners of Ramen's lips quirk up in a fond (can he call it fond? It looks fond) smile as he starts to softly sing along to the song. Kaizo melts slightly- he's a really good singer. Ramen's voice rises with the music but it stays a whisper- for him to hear and him alone. Kaizo shivers a bit at the intimacy and he can't help but grin at the silly love-struck smile on Ramen's face. He's just so _cute_ , it's nearly impossible not to melt right then and there in his arms.

The song draws to a close and Ramen gently traces his lips with his thumb. "Can we- you wanna do it-"

Kaizo closes the gap for him before he can finish and he freezes for a moment before leaning into his mouth and deepening the kiss. Kaizo sighs softly and grins against his lips before Ramen tilts his head to the side and presses harder again. They break apart for a split second to catch their breath before grabbing each other again and kissing the life out of each other. Ramen's hands drop to Kaizo's waist and hold him close against his body, and Kaizo runs his fingers through his hair, messing it up and dragging it back.

Ramen pulls away again and this time he pauses, breathing heavily against Kaizo's mouth. "I want you," he murmurs softly.

Kaizo flushes deeper, if that's even possible. "You too," he whispers back, finally admitting it and resting his head on Ramen's shoulder.

Ramen tilts his head a bit. "Do you really?"

Kaizo doesn't trust himself to speak so he nods, pressing his head further into Ramen's neck.

"That tickles!" Ramen laughs, leaning away. Kaizo responds by humming into his neck and Ramen tries and fails to escape again. 

Kaizo turns his head to watch his face for a few moments, widening his eyes innocently, before Ramen leans forward suddenly to catch his lips again.

"Mm...but what about my dad?" Ramen asks when they break apart again.

Kaizo frowns slightly. "I'm here kissing you and you wanna talk about your _dad?_ "

"Well I mean, you know, what's he going to think about this…" Ramen trails off thoughtfully.

"How about, you kiss me _now_ , and we care about your dad _later_."

Ramen laughs. "Getting clingy, eh?"

Kaizo pouts and steps back. "Fine, then don't try to get me to dance next time out of the blue." He turns and leaves for his room.

"What? No, come back-" Ramen chases him through the spaceship, trying to pin him down for one more kiss to change his mind before they arrive at TEMPUR-A station.

One more, more like one hundred more.

And many more after that.


End file.
